satirical article number one

The Peak of Evolution: Music now creates the greatest success of all time

“Hot Problems”, a song by Double Take, debuted on YouTube as an Internet sensation that became viral in April, and has since then triggered great interest from the audience. Subsequently, I decided to investigate this wild reaction from the viewers of “Hot Problems”. After several interviews among students and adult listeners, all they had to say was “Wow. This is the best song I have ever heard in all my life.” 

Of course, being a journalist, I had to do my research prior to interviewing. From what I saw, the song definitely deserves recognition for its incredible musicality. It was written and performed by Double Take, composed of two teenage girls who passionately sing about their struggles of “being hot and pretty” in their melodious voices. The song consists of about four different notes (albeit off-pitch, but I'm sure it was intended to add a special effect) and about two different harmonies, which creates immense musical variety.

From a Facebook interview, “Jacqueline Angell Bieberrxxx” revealed her opinion about “Hot Problems”, writing that, “there is like an inexplicable way the singers can like make us like understand exactly like what theyre saying!!! like omg i know exactly how like hot girls struggle becuz theyre like thought of as like stuck up and stuff but like really theyre like normal people even though like people start rumours like about them. like i luvvv Hot Problems cuz its like totally relatable♥♥ like xoxox.” From the video’s 26 000 likes on YouTube, I can conclude that this is the opinion of the majority.

The song and video resemble the creativity of the greatest musical works, something that is very difficult to achieve. The girls are shown wearing loads of makeup (not bad for skin at all) and skimpy clothes, partying in a limo for the entire duration of the video. They are obviously having fun, dancing to a catchy beat, and being carefree like the teenagers this generation should be like. 

 “Hot girls, we have problems, too.

We’re just like you,

Except we’re hot.”

In addition, these inventive lyrics are reminiscent of songs such as Justin Bieber’s “Baby”, and Rebecca Black’s “Friday”, which are both favourites of listeners. 

The best of the Biebs:

“Baby, baby, baby, oh!

Baby, baby, baby, oh!“

RB’s creative and educational lyrics:

“Yesterday was Thursday,

Today is Friday,

Tomorrow is Saturday,

And Sunday comes afterwards.”

When it comes to recognizing the inner material of the song, we know that Double Take is wise in their advice. They believe that hot girls should not care about wits and should only want to have fun. Again, like the beloved Rebecca Black in her song “Friday”, the importance of partying plays a major role. Clearly, this has influenced teenagers of our time in a positive way. Combining their prodigious musicality and genius lyricism, “Hot Problems” could very well become the milestone in the evolution of music.

In conclusion, this song and music video have the potential to become a perpetual number one in the billboard charts. This masterpiece has definitely beaten out all composers and musicians of before. My recommendation to you is that musical taste is important in your lifestyle, so make sure to have this song on your music player (only costs $0.99 and takes a few seconds to download). I myself even bought seven (7) copies of the song on iTunes to put on my iPod. I assure you that listening to music of such talent is worth it.